Daily Archives: October 18, 2016

Day in a Life: The Unbearable Madness of being a FTWM

Right. First off, I was supposed to post this several hours ago. But like almost every single day of my life, I can’t seem to get my act together to ensure that everything happens the way I want it to. I’m just going to ramble on and put in some pictures (from our annual photo shoot with Steph Tan) that are almost totally unrelated to the post and hope that no one notices.


Morning. Utter chaos. I wake up at 6am. I used to take the firstborn to school and she would have a nervous breakdown and sit outside my room and cry if we didn’t leave the house by 6.30am. These days, she’s decided that Daddy should drive her so I take it easy and leave the house about 6.45am to go to work. Then the husband comes back home and takes the boys to childcare and kindy.


Mid-morning to late afternoon. I work my butt off. I’m a teacher and I enjoy my job. Of course there are angsty moments but I wouldn’t give it up. While working, I also have to ensure that the kids are alive and in the correct locations and deal with various administrative issues that never fail to pop up. We have forgotten to pick children or they have been missed from the school bus on certain occasions. Not proud of it but it has happened and will keep happening.

Also, at any time, I’m in about 10 different Whatsapp chat groups dealing with various aspects of the kids’ lives (class group, enrichment class group, swimming class group, birthday party group, after school care group, etc.). The husband is not in any of these groups. Sometimes I take a kid to enrichment class in the afternoon. Thanks to a whole village support system (consisting of parents, in-laws, aunts, siblings, friends), we get quite a bit of help with the ferrying around for various things and when work gets in the way.


Evening. We collect the kids from various locations and get home for dinner. Sometimes I go for bootcamp or rollerblade or even head out with friends. This is quite a recent development now that the baby is a lot more independent. The husband has tennis on some evenings. There’s almost always one of us around to read the kids a bedtime story and put them to bed. After they are asleep is when I catch up with work or blogging.


The thing about being a FTWM (at least from my personal experience and IMHO) is that I am always tired, I never get enough sleep, I constantly feel like I’m forgetting something or other, and there is an incredible amount of stress when something falls through the cracks. And so many things fall through the cracks. The sheer amount of mummy guilt associated with being a working mum is so insurmountable that I’ve chosen to ignore it altogether and I refuse to feel guilty about my chosen path.

So here’s hoping that all those articles about children of working mums turning out well, that daughters of working mums are more successful and sons more caring, are true. And I can’t emphasise this enough: whether you choose to work full-time, part-time, from home, or not at all, whatever works for your family and keeps you sane is the best decision you can make. Cheers to mothers everywhere.


Next up is Debs G from Owls Well whose day in a life is all about teaching her youngest kid how to toddler. Debs is a Sunda Scops Owl who married a nice British Barn Owl and is raising a trio of hungry young owlets in a highrise tree in Singapore. Debs is a trained medical professional who is currently training to be A Parent. Debs also blogs about her adventures abroad at Owl Fly Away. Occasionally, she posts pictures on her Instagram account at @4owlswell


Thank you for hopping on board this blog train hosted by the inspirational Justina of Mum in the Making. Click on Day in a Life blog train to take a peek into a day in the life of other mummies!